7/16/24
still taking the Allergiemittel every day, about three times daily.
I wonder if getting sick and almost dying from taking care of them is nature’s way of protecting your heart from loving your baby too much. in every quiet moment that my mind is not occupied, it wanders back to him. BUT then I remember how traumatic breast-feeding was, and i’m so glad he’s not going to stay a baby forever.
7/19/24
had a totally painless, pain-free period this cycle. I think this might have been a first of all time – there’s usually at least some mild cramping. but this time, there was nothing – I only felt the blood when it came out, which I think I once read is how it’s supposed to be if you’re healthy.
our 5th wedding anniversary coming up in august. was thinking how a wedding is like a beginning. then had this feeling: we won’t know how important it was that we found and then chose each other, until the end, after we’ve been through everything. like only then will we realize…the impact, the significance of having each other, of having had each other, R and I.
have stopped seeing the counselor in order to save money (was $60 each session and afterwards i would keep thinking of all the groceries i could’ve bought with $60). i told her maybe we could meet as-needed, but lately it feels like we’re doing good and can handle things.
Marriage Journal 