7/19/23
no weapon formed against you shall prosper.
applied to see this local functional medicine doc, dr caffrey, for my skin. he responded quickly and accepted me, but looks like next available appt i can make is not until like a month out. feel a little hope with this, tho lots of $$ and not covered by insurance- maybe good it’s a month away, bc not sure yet how i’m gonna afford it.
feet are better from the new disinfect-moisturize-wrap routine i started. not dramatically, but definitely a step up. hands were doing worse today and i resorted finally to using the prescribed Mupirocin. amazingly, where i applied it felt a little better almost immediately, so i applied it to my neck too, which was also doing worse/very bad. it didn’t sting and seems to be doing… something. something good i think.
7/23/23
having “period” now
started oral antibiotics (amoxicillin) today in the morning, now must continue it 3x a day for five days. when I wake up, most days this past week, it seems no better, and I even see some small spots where it’s starting to spread (on right wrist, both arms, lower face), despite my natural remedy tactics. I don’t know what else to do now besides just follow the dermatologist’s directions (that she gave me a week ago). At least i just bought this probiotic (bacillus subtilis) to balance out the effects.
taking antihistamine too (OTC Equate brand loratadine) because I’m feeling really just irritated/allergic too these days. Especially when I get overheated/sweaty, it really triggers it. I don’t know what’s the main trigger though. We eliminated coconut from Hunter’s diet (and from mine too)- just started two days ago- to see if that’s triggering him, because he still has itchy rashes too (R mentioned that mine and Hunter’s skin seems to get bad at the same time. idk). He seems itchier lately so much so that I bought him two “scratch sleeves” to keep him from morning and night itching as well as some more moisturizers w/o coconut (a beef tallow ointment by vintage tradition, Waxelene, and Alba organics Un-petroleum jelly).
I keep wavering back and forth between wanting to strictly stick to my all-natural standards and then not caring what it takes (even if that means pumping my body full of steroids), if it means relief.
today had just dropped baby off at Granny’s, driving in the car just R and me, we were quiet, and then I asked him, “Do you think the more someone suffers, the greater their capacity for happiness?” He said yes almost immediately. He said…he thinks that’s why rich people who’ve always been rich are never happy.
Marriage Journal 