8/10/25

11:39 pm: currently having text conv with R from one of the nearest distances ever; he is in Hunter’s bedroom and i’m sitting on a stool right outside it, next to Hunter’s potty. H just fell asleep (he’s in a sleep late/wake up late pattern) and i didn’t want to go in and try to keep my voice down saying all i needed to say to R (he could turn off the AC because it would be cool tonight, trivial family matters, questions about charges on our joint account) so just sat down in the darkness save for this patch of light hitting the stool in a spotlight-like way from outside, and started texting. So convenient but also still feels weird to not go directly to a person who is like 10 feet from me to talk. like when I chuckled about something he said, I thought he might’ve heard my actual laugh in real time from inside the room. so much revolves around the baby, still. For how long? 5, 10, 15 years more? Forever, permanently?