parts to reincarnate

10/17/2020

“This universe- quantum physics has shown—this is a quantum cosmos. It’s quantum on every scale—the micro and the macro—and everywhere in between. In a quantum system, there’s no separate parts.” – author Paul Levy

“The ongoing work of trying to get free: there are parts to kill, and parts to reincarnate again and again.” – Imani Perry, Breathe: A Letter to My Sons

10/19/20

me and R’s last words to each other tonight before we went to sleep:

me: “i wonder what a ghost would do if you farted”

R: “I think he would fade away”

me LOL

(we just watched that Bly Manor thing on Netflix and were talking about ghosts and I was scared, but after that exchange I kept imagining the scenario and was like 100% not scared anymore)

10/21/20

12:16 pm: Realtor just told us that our offer on the house was accepted! (and weird cause I mentioned while we were touring it, “I think I like this house better than all the other houses we’ve seen.”)

around 5:10 pm: “double ham, double cheese.” – Rodrigo to himself while ordering our celebration pizza from the Domino’s app when he got home (and he brought home champagne & wine)

got a thought tonight: if you are totally enclosed in soft smooth skin, and are healthy, there’s nothing more to ask for in life. That is ultimate happiness, to me.

10/24/20—Something I’ve been thinking about: how Joseph Murphy says that God doesn’t respond to begging or pleading. How he responds more to like, claiming your right and claiming your power that is already in existence inside you. I couldn’t really think of a metaphor for it, couldn’t really relate until today, coming home from the BLM March, striding up driveway of my parents’ house and one of the garage doors was open with dad working inside, and I walked right in, no hesitation, knowing that (for the last 35 years) everything there was mine too, everything there belonged to our whole family, including me, and there was no need to intellectualize any of this- it’s just something I instinctively knew and have always known. Approaching the garage and passing the threshold of its open door, there was no question- no needing to think it out or work it out in any way in my mind. It’s something I know in my body, without words, that I belong there and that everything there belongs to me. I was thinking- that’s what claiming your God-power must be like- something like that.

10/25/20—was just laughing so hard cause we just scheduled our home inspection, and afterwards R said it would be funny if the inspector showed up w/a magnifying glass, smoking a pipe, in a trench coat (like Inspector Gadget).